We had a bit of a windstorm here the other day and I say ‘a bit of’ because I know there are many of you in other parts of the world where it gets a lot windier than it does here. Here is BC, Canada. It’s pretty mild and rainy around here. Well, it is a lot rainy around here especially at this time of year and if you haven’t grown up here it can get old very fast. I have grown up here and I find myself talking about how over it I am a lot. (On a side note when it gets sunny and close to Spring and I’m talking just a little sun coming through the clouds everyone gets giddy and shorts make an appearance. Oh, west coast people.)
Back to that windstorm. Our power goes out easily. One sway of a branch and it’s dark. That night I had plans to catch up on my dvred shows (the Office and 30 Rock), eat ice cream and glue my eyes to the TV. No power makes that impossible. It’s deflating. I like my electricity. We pull out the flashlights, the candles, envy the neighbor’s generator, turn on the gas fireplace and I am made very aware of me.
No distractions. No power. No TV. No sound except for the wind. No armor. Just me.
I think most of us want to be known. To have someone in your life that gets you. You need to be heard. You want to be validated.
While I, fortunately, have a few people like that in my life when I am confronted with a blackout how comfortable am I in my skin? Nothing to come between me and my voice and my thoughts. No armor. Do I like what’s there?
There is the initial panic. I so love getting caught up in a show or reading a good book (which I tried later by candlelight. It isn’t as easy as I thought. It takes a lot of candles. It was all very Little House on the Prairie…maybe that’s why Mary went blind) or there must be something I’m supposed to be cleaning. Take all of that away and I am not a shell. There is something in there after all. Someone I can live with. Most of my growing up years were based on who am I? If no one says I’m good enough, am I good enough? After all the growing and accepting and I am making so many mistakes that surely I will know better next time something has stuck. I am known. To me. And I have deemed it good.
In 30 Rock
Did anyone catch this week’s episode? When my power returned the next day I finally caught up and, oh, it was a funny one!! It is such a witty and clever show. If you don’t watch and one evening you find yourself thinking, I am bored and I need something to go with all of this chocolate rent or buy or download the second season of 30 Rock. Sit back, eat your chocolate, and let the funny wash over you.