It’s hard to be clear. I can’t seem to string my thoughts together to form complete sentences. I can’t get my point across. I’m thinking it’s because I don’t have one. A point. A focus. I don’t have that right now. I think that is summer’s purpose. To do away with destinations further than the beach and having points. The fall is being ushered in early by back to school shopping and Halloween costumes dangling in stores’ windows. I’m being dragged from summer to fall and for the first time in a long time I’m not ready to see summer go.
I love the fall and its beautiful colors. I look forward to BC apples and pumpkin pies. It’s my favorite season. You know that. I’ve said it here before. I’ve given my head a break this season. I’ve let things go until the fall comes. I’ve said that out loud. When the fall comes I will… With fall comes renewed energy and vision. That’s what I hope for.
When I took that writing course I felt as though it was the right time to take that course. Not just because I had time. Not only because my kids were a little older. It was the right time for me. There were pieces in my life that needed to come together. I could let my guard down. I could stop disqualifying myself long enough to give the course a chance, therefore giving myself a chance. I could put stock into the feeling that followed me around urging me to listen, listen. You know that feeling. You can’t shake it. You try to outrun it or drown it in distraction, but it’s always there beating in your chest or sneaking up on you in your sleep as you drift from dream to dream. It was the right time for me.
When I took that course our instructor told us to find the story that gave us the most energy. I tried my hand at a few subjects, but I found myself drawn to the story that holds great significance for me. The one with weight. There are many stories that lead to that story and many stories after, but it’s that story, the story that has enough energy for me to pursue it. I started experimenting with it in class and at home. Summer took over and I told myself and anyone that asked I would write that story, the story in the fall. I would give it attention then. I meant it. It might take years to write, but I still mean it.
The days are getting shorter. I’ve noticed crispness to the night air that wasn’t there a week ago. While summer is clearing the path for fall my feeling is gathering strength. Stores and schools in their too soon-ness are demanding we be prepared. Get ready. Summer is slipping from my grip and my feeling is urging me to listen, listen. It won’t let go of me or is it that I can’t let go of it? Whichever it is, it’s time to get ready.
In True Blood – Season Two
Now I know this isn’t everyone’s kind of show, but, I love this show. This season, especially, has been great. The summer doesn’t offer much in the way of good television, so True Blood has become a staple. Every Sunday Scott and I are glued to that TV waiting to see what unfolds next. What will happen to the people of Bon Temps? Will Maryann die or whatever it is that’s supposed to happen to make her go away? Will anything happen between Sookie and Eric? (If anyone else is watching, are you loving Eric as much as I am?) Two more episodes left…can’t wait!